Just a quick heads up. I’m leaving for Las Vegas today and won’t be back until next week. Enjoy the weekend!

I found this on Gothamist. When I see something like this, I am totally disillusioned. I feel like I have been wasting the last few years. Here I am working like a dog, trying to move up, and this MTA salary list is like a slap in the face. These cleaners and station attendants are already making more than me, and it took me three years to get to this salary.

“Station Agent”, that’s a token booth clerk right? How hard could that job be? They don’t even have to be nice to people. Collect the money, here’s a Metrocard. I could do that for $22.74 an hour (over $47,000 a year). Although maybe I could take a job as a track cleaner ($22.94/hr, $47,715/year). Then I would have the training to sneak around the tunnels safely, and explore the abandoned ones like these guys.

Wow, what a change to contemplate.

No one is calling it that yet, so I guess the chance of it catching on is slim to none. It’s not entirely accurate either. Still though, I do like it. Unless you watch American news channels you know I’m talking about the war between Ethiopia and a Somali Islamic faction. They’ve actually been fighting for a few weeks now, and last week a representative of the Union of Islamic Courts (that’s the Somali Islamists trying to form a government) said they’re already at war with Ethiopia. Nevertheless, I like the Christmas War for a name because here on Christmas Eve, Ethiopia has finally sent bombers into Somalia and owned up to fighting a war there. Previously they denied it, saying they merely had military advisors helping the Somali transitional government.

There’s so much information involved in this little story I don’t know where to begin! I guess I’ll start with why we should care at all. The obvious answer is that every Islamic government that comes to power is now the concern of the US. The Union of Islamic Courts portrays themselves as pious individuals trying to bring order to the Somali anarchy. The transitional government in Baidoa had so little domestic support they couldn’t even take up residence in Somalia’s real capital, Mogadishu. The UIC aimed to fill that power vacuum and turn Somalia into an official Islamic state. The reality of the UIC is that you have a group that may have originally stood for orderly, religious government, but has attracted a lot of radical Islamists with a much grander agenda. Their chief aim is to establish a caliphate of the Ogaden Desert. This means they would have to conquer a large swath of southern Ethiopia, all of Djibouti, plus a northern section of Kenya. That’s hardly a recipe for peace.

The territorial threat is only one reason why Ethiopia cares. If it was only a matter of land, Ethiopia could sit back and wait for the attack. There are a few reasons why Ethiopia feels they need to stomp out these Islamists early. One is there has been a secessionist movement in the south of Ethiopia going on for years. The Ogaden National Liberation Front has been fighting to breakaway. Then you have the Oromo Liberation Front who have been fighting for a fairer distribution of power in Ethiopia. You don’t want these rebels working out a deal with the UIC and forming an alliance against you.

Ethiopia is also committed to propping up Somalia’s transitional government. As far as I can tell this is solely because it’s led by Abdullahi Yusuf Ahmed, a long time ally. With the transitional government in place, Ethiopia can rest assured with an ally in power and a government that few people listen to.

Still though the biggest reason to go to war now is Eritrea. Before this current war flared up, Eritrea had been funneling weapons and supplies to rebels based in Somalia who are attacking Ethiopia and the transitional government. This is a good old fashioned proxy war, just like the US and USSR used to fight. Eritrea has about 2000 soldiers in Somalia supporting the UIC, which of course the Eritreans deny. Ethiopia can’t attack Eritrea directly because UN peacekeepers are in the way and that would lead to some pretty stiff UN sanctions. Besides their last war was an exhausting slugfest. Those two countries hate each other but I’m not sure either side is itching to repeat a major war.

So now the Christmas War begins. Everyone expects Ethiopia to trounce the UIC, particularly the Ethiopian Prime Minister who said they would finish them off in one or two weeks. He is a politician so he does have to put on a brave face, but I think he’s being a little too cocky. Apparently foreign fighters have been flooding in to support the UIC. Ethiopia may get bogged down in a guerrilla war. Their saving grace may be that Ethiopian generals aren’t worried about killing civilians, so these jihadis will have a tougher time making hit and run attacks than they do in Iraq. I think the terrain there is not nearly as mountainous as in Afghanistan, so they should also have a more difficult time hiding. That bodes well for Ethiopia, but I’m pretty sure we’ll still be reading about this war in at least six months. 

I don’t know if other countries have pageant winners like we do, but I am tempted to say America has the very best. Miss USA rocked the NYC party scene and teased us all by smooching Miss Teen USA. I didn’t think anyone would top that but Miss Nevada USA (not Miss Nevada who is affiliated with Miss America) stepped up. Excuse me, I should say the ex-Miss Nevada USA.

Photos of Katie Rees (thank you TMZ!), former Miss Nevada, surfaced of her at a pretty awesome party where she showed off her ass and boobs, made out with some girls and had some simulated lesbian sex. I say simulated since they kept their panties on, but still pretty damn good to see.

A thought occurred to me about this… Rees claims she was 17 when this party happened and this was just a youthful mistake (she’s 22 now). So does that make these pictures child pornography? Seventeen is a minor so doesn’t that mean any sexually suggestive photos of a 17 year old are illegal? No one else has brought this up so I guess not.

The Miss Nevada USA people were quick to update their website. They have the replacement, Helen Salas, on the website already. Geez, she’s ridiculously hot. Why didn’t she win in the first place?

space

Okay I know I’m posting a lot of celebrity talk lately but this news is SHOCKING! Jennifer Aniston, America’s Sweetheart, was spotted having drinks with Kevin Federline, America’s Sleazebag. Pardon me, I just threw up a little in my mouth.

It’s like watching a slow motion car crash. My feelings are just shock and fright. I can see how they might have something to relate to, them both just getting out of serious relationships. Still though, the idea of them getting together is utterly bizarre. Britney Spears was trailer trash so her and Federline together didn’t seem unnatural. Stupid yes, but not unnatural. Jennifer Aniston though is far more respectable than Spears. I can only guess that Angelina Jolie stealing away her man shattered her ego. Aniston goes from Brad Pitt to a shlub like Vince Vaughn. Vaughn should be checking my radiator’s coolant level, not dating a classy looking woman like Jennifer Aniston. Now that Vaughn is gone, I guess Aniston is hitting rock bottom.

It’s so sad. I can only hope this was a chance meeting, they had a few drinks and they never see each other again. Otherwise someone please let me know what voodoo priest gave Fedex the power to charm any woman. I need to see them immediately.

Btw, I only included this picture because Jen looks remarkably hot to me. I’m not sure why though. Just very hot.

No one seems to have suspected this but Trump has spared Miss USA. Tara Conner will instead be shipped off to rehab. I am particularly shocked because she tested positive for cocaine use. Rehab wouldn’t surprise me if this was a case of her getting drunk nightly. Sure it’s over kill for normal people, but you have to show the media you’re doing something. However, Conner used cocaine. Maybe that’s no big deal to New York socialites but I would expect that to turn the Heartland against her. Maybe even more so than the lesbian kissing.

Trump isn’t known for his “heart of gold” so I can only assume this all was a huge stunt to get people paying attention to the Miss USA pageant. Remember it wasn’t too long ago when the pageant was expected to disappear. ABC stopped airing it and it was forced to broadcast on CMT. When Trump bought it and moved the show from dreary Atlantic City to Vegas, it was about getting public attention so people would watch it again. A Miss USA that whores around Manhattan, snorts coke and makes out with Miss Teen USA is definitely going to grab some headlines.

Hey isn’t the next Miss USA pageant only four months away?

a

b

c

d

e

f

g

Today was a pretty great day. I worked out hard again. My trainer really pushed me, and my arms actually feel different after the exercise. Not sore or hurting, but different somehow; sort of like the muscles are being continually tensed. Even so I still made it to work early and had a very successful meeting. I was worried we wouldn’t have enough to discuss to fill up the hour, but it turns out we could have gone for two. Plus I filled in the holiday schedule.

The reason for the title to this post is something that happened after the meeting. Remember the annoying new guy who sits next to me? Last week I gave him a pack of hand wipes from the kitchen to clean up his desk after it got covered in dust. So today he asks me where the wipes come from. I was thinking he’s finally going to put them back so I tell him to leave them in the kitchen and someone will eventually put them away. But no he wanted to know where they come from so he could get another package and take it home. He says to me, rather loudly I think, “I want to take it home.”

I guess I’m just old school but if you’re stealing office supplies I think you should be quiet about it. There was no whispering, no hinting. So I reply, “Oh, don’t steal office supplies,” and he tries to laugh it off looking pretty obviously disappointed I didn’t tell him where the wipes come from. Some people just have no discretion.

I haven’t watched SNL in years so I didn’t hear about this video until today. It will definitely bring a smile to your face. NSFW, just so you know.

This weekend has pushed me harder than anything has in years. For a good while I have lived a very stress free life. Things didn’t bother me. I learned to let go of the problems I can’t do anything about. In short, I was very mellow. That all came to an end now.

Sunday got me pretty angry at a few people from work, but it really started on Saturday where I really disappointed myself. I had a busy day planned. I needed a haircut, get some grocery shopping done and a car wash to get rid of some terrible water spots. Most importantly I was going to start the day with a trip to the gym. It would have been the first day I went without having an appointment with a trainer. But of course I crapped out. When my alarm rang, I turned it off and went back to sleep. I didn’t get up until noon and I didn’t feel like doing anything. No gym, no haircut and no groceries. I am completely ashamed of myself.

That day passes and I feel pretty lousy about my laziness. Sunday only made my mood worse. I went into work as usual and when I read my email I get some pretty bad news. Our New York employee is coming back to California to visit family, so I had to rearrange the work schedule for her. She is a screw up, so from past experience I knew not to rely on emails to talk to her. This time I called her on Wednesday and clearly, or so I thought, went over Saturday’s new schedule with her. I even gave her two choices and she had to pick one. In spite of that she logs in to the system according to the old schedule. I guess my boss had an inkling there would be trouble because he discovers the trouble around 11 am that day. Unfortunately though, he thinks our other Saturday employee has made the mistake because he goes into his email and refers to my old schedule. See, originally I created a schedule all on my own. I emailed this to my boss for his approval. However he wants to change Saturday’s schedule but by the time Saturday actually comes around he’s completely forgot he made the change!

I am just exasperated as I read this email conversation. I worked really hard and made a lot of calls to set this schedule and it’s wrecked thanks to stupidity. Now I look like I’m incapable of managing a simple schedule change right when I’m trying to get a raise and a promotion. What really brings the bile up to my mouth is my own powerlessness. Right now by taking on these new responsibilities I feel like I am opening up myself to these sorts of failures, but I don’t have any corresponding authority over these people. I set this schedule but I have no way to enforce it. I can’t lecture or threaten this girl because I have no way to discipline her at all. She is a pretty lousy employee who I would have liked to replace before this incident. Her only redeeming quality is that she is willing to work these crazy early shifts.

This isn’t even the only problem I’m having at work. I wanted to fire the new temp we brought on last month. I told my boss I didn’t think the guy took the job seriously and seemed like he was just looking for excuses not to work. I thought he would be fired but no. He’s still there, constantly asking me what do I think of this name or is that one believable. I need to make a sign that says “Just call it” to spare my voice. What’s worse is that this guy can’t work weekends because he has another job. The very point of hiring a new person was to improve our weekend coverage but this guy can’t do it. I don’t want to remind my boss of this though because then it looks like I’m gunning for this guy’s job. However when the screw up girl goes on vacation next week, we’re totally short on the weekends. Our only other Saturday employee can’t even reliably wake up on time.

So my Saturday ended with disappointment and my Sunday ended with rage. I don’t think it’s any surprise that I broke my fast food limit today. Since I didn’t go grocery shopping I had no food to cook. I considered stopping at the store late on my way home, but I just didn’t have the energy to shop and cook. I was way too frustrated. I drowned my sorrows in Wendy’s double cheeseburger and chicken nuggets. Then I felt gross and bloated, and wallowed in my self pity. Tomorrow I must get back on the horse. I can’t exercise though because I need to do some morning grocery shopping. At least that way I won’t be eating burgers again at night.

This story has gotten better and better. It started out small. It was just some talk about Miss USA pageant officials being upset with Miss USA’s penchant for partying. That’s hardly a surprise. Tara Conner is young, pretty and living rent free. Of course she would want to go barhopping.

This weekend though, it just got interesting. Conner tested positive for coke! Oh yeah, but wait there’s more. Reports the Daily News…

“Tara was a party animal,” said a source who knows Conner, 20, and Miss Teen USA Katie Blair, 18, from some of the city’s top nightspots. “I’ve seen them kiss before. They always dance all sexy on the tables. … They definitely get close.”

Oh that’s too beautiful. Let’s just take a moment to really enjoy this news.

What’s a damn shame is there is no footage of these two kissing. In this day and age of ubiquitous camera phones, there is no excuse for someone not to capture one of these moments. Dammit, someone produce a small, grainy image of these two lip locked!

Yeah I know Conner and Blair probably aren’t total lesbians. More like the ‘every girl is two drinks away’ lesbian. That’s fine with me. It’s still wonderful to see.

Anyway, Conner has been stripped of her title and kicked out of the Trump house. Tamiko Nash will take over the title and I imagine would be partying a lot less. Nash is pretty, but certainly second place to Conner (but to the right that is extraordinarily hot picture of Nash). Of course if she hooks up with Blair then her esteem shall grow in my pants..err, I mean eyes.