I think anyone who has paid attention to Gadhafi finds him to be a pretty self serving figure. That’s why I had to greet his latest message with some skepticism. Good ol’ Moammar warned the world to stay out of Darfur until the rebels agreed to work for peace. I imagine few know that the rebels in Darfur are actually broken into three groups and only one has agreed to take part in peace talks with the Sudanese government.

Since this is coming from Gadhafi you have to wonder what’s in it for him. For roughly ten years now he’s been making a big push towards African nationalism. Maybe he wants the world to stay away from Darfur because he wants the glory of bringing about a peace settlement. He’ll be able to trumpet himself as the great savior of Africa. Then again maybe Gadhafi has worked out some secret deal with Sudan. Maybe the Sudanese are going to put him touch with Chinese oilmen who can modernize his decrepit oil infrastructure. They do share a border. A Libyan pipeline through Sudan to the Red Sea would make it easier to reach Asian markets. Sudan and Libya are both pretty isolated so this could even be as simple as creating a friendly relationship.

But we don’t even need to worry about any of that because Gadhafi is right. There is no good reason for us to get involved. The problem is that Darfur has replaced Tibet as the trendy political cause. Masses of people with nothing to do with their lives bitch and moan about how we in the West should stop the war going on there. Darfur is their moral crusade but do they care about the wars going on in Somalia, the Central African Republic, the proxy war between Sudan and Chad, the fighting in Congo, the rebels in Assam (that’s India folks), an escalating civil war in Sri Lanka, and so on and so on. There’s violence in so many places yet Darfur is our responsibility?

Those rebels started this war. They should be ones to finish it not us. Most of them don’t want a peace deal. Are we supposed to send in soldiers to an active war zone? Do these protesters expect us to impose peace? The US has not had any success doing that in Iraq. I don’t see why we should expect the UN to succeed at it in Darfur.

I am not a Buick fan. No American born after 1975 is. I guess that’s why GM chose to unveil the Buick Riviera concept car at the Shanghai Auto Show. I remember reading in the WSJ how Buick is doing so well among Chinese buyers.

I’m not really thrilled with this Riviera concept. I think it’s a pretty big departure for Buick, but I wouldn’t exactly call it bold. I don’t mean to sound as if I am disapproving. I actually like the car except for that front end. The thing is every time I look at it I think of the last generation of the Mercury Cougar. They both have a busy front end (although the Buick is busier than the Merc). The oversized rear end of the car is where I really see the resemblance. It’s as if the two cars have wide hips. You look, you decide.

Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis, who has been in some recent legal trouble, was sent to his cell literally crying. Man that is not a good image for someone starting out in prison. Before this Francis seemed to dismiss these legal problems. When a judge ordered him to settle a lawsuit, he flew off the handle and complained about the judge calling him a “Judge Gone Wild“. Oh so witty. Then the judge ordered him to surrender to US marshals for contempt of court, but Francis decided to snub that order and wait five extra days before surrendering. So now he’s in jail waiting for his court date but that doesn’t mean he’s going to be on good behavior. Instead guards find prescription drugs in his cell and one guard says Francis tried to bribe him $500 for a bottle of water. Oh yeah and the IRS charged him with tax evasion. I think I would cry in that situation too.

He has been sentenced to 35 days for his contempt charge. The tax evasion charge puts him at risk of a 10 year jail sentence. I bring this up because all the commentary I have seen about this story has been of the “he’s getting his comeuppance” variety. A lot of people are pretty happy Francis is now facing a lot of jail time. Really though what did he do that inspires this bitterness? This is where I have to disagree with everyone. I guess this will be the only blog that “defends” Francis but so be it then.

I have to put defends in quotes because I am not saying he shouldn’t go to jail. Plainly he gave a figurative middle finger to the judge so he deserves his 35 days in jail. If it turns out he really did evade taxes, then by all means throw him in jail some more. I am going to defend Francis from all the vindictive people who smile with glee when they hear about his legal troubles. As far as I’m concerned his Girls Gone Wild series should not inspire this much hatred. Over and over I have heard it described as exploitative. In what way was Francis exploiting these girls? No one was coerced into showing their boobs. He didn’t hold a gun to their heads or pull a knife on them. They were never blackmailed. These girls could easily have left the party or at least walked away from the camera if they found this so disgusting. You can’t even say this was economic exploitation because these were all partying college girls; hardly a desperately poor demographic segment.

I am so sick of people ignoring personal responsibility. Joe Francis is not responsible for these girls’ behavior. The girls are responsible for their behavior! They chose to go wild on camera. Stop blaming Francis for other people’s poor decisions. I’m sure so many of them are forever embarrassed when their trampy moment is splashed across a TV commercial and they should have to live with that. Decisions have consequences.

The hilarity of the situation was captured best in a Saturday Night Live skit with Kate Hudson. Sadly I could not find the video for it but that link will take you to a transcript. If you do have the video, let me know so I can post it.

Dad: We did not send you to college for that! You can pay for college yourself with the money you made from that tape.

Daughter: I didn’t get any money from that tape..

Dad: Well, good going, Einstein! Someone else gets rich off of you showing your coconuts!

I feel the need to call attention to a really stupid headline I saw on MSNBC. I took this screenshot from their website last weekend. I know it’s a little blurry but I had to shrink it down to fit in the space here. The headline is “French candidates may face runoff”.

I can forgive you if you don’t understand why that is stupid, but I cannot let MSNBC off for it. Those people are running a news website. They’re supposed to be professional journalists who understand the stories they’re covering. See, that headline is dumb because French presidential candidates always face a runoff. That’s how their electoral system works. In the first round, everyone who is running gets on the ballot. Then the top two are put on the final ballot. There is no ‘may’ about it. I think an equivalent to the American election would be “Votes may be cast on Election Day”. MSNBC, don’t let undergrad interns write your headlines.

A woman is never more beautiful than when she’s carrying a child. What bunk! All that talk about how a pregnant woman is beautiful, or has that magical “glow”, is a lot of crap. That’s just stuff people say to make pregnant women feel better. After all gaining 40 pounds in a pot belly really must hurt your self esteem.

I really surprised the hell out of myself though. The picture you see below is of a very pregnant Jaime Pressly at the Screen Actors Guild Awards. I think that was a few months ago but this is the first time I’ve seen these pictures. Good lord I have never been attracted to a pregnant woman until right now. Pressly is stunning! The Superficial has more pics of her at the SAG Awards. Enjoy some fine pregnant ass while I try to rebuild my preconceptions.

The fight between Karl Rove and the enviro-celeb duo of Cheryl Crow and An Inconvenient Truth producer Laurie David is the best piece of news I’ve read in a long while. It’s the sort of story that’s easily twisted to fit your political persuasion.

At last weekend’s White House Correspondents Dinner those three got into an argument that on the surface was about the environment but was really tinged with politics. I would have liked to tell you about this first hand but it looks like the post office lost my invitation. They do this every year. I really should lodge a complaint one of these days. At the dinner Crow and David decide to approach Rove, who was sitting at his table, and make a plea for him to reconsider his opinion on the state of the environment. That much is plain. Lets look at the exchange though their eyes.

Crow/David Filter

Crow and David approach Rove discretely and respectfully.

Crow: Hello Mr. Rove. Do you have a free moment? I was hoping we could discuss your stance on the environment. It’s a topic that is dear to me and I wonder if you would be willing to re-examine the science on the subject.

Rove: Shut up you stupid bitch!

Rove turns away.

Crow: Excuse me?! Please Mr. Rove, be reasonable. I just wanted to have a rational discussion. Why won’t you listen for just a few minutes?

Crow taps Rove’s arm to get his attention.

Rove: Don’t touch me you goddamn liberal!

Crow: You can’t speak to us like that, you work for us.

Rove: I don’t work for you, I work for the American people.

Crow: We are the American people.

Rove Filter

Crow and David march up to Rove’s table wearing malicious grins.

Crow: Hey, I want to talk to you about your idiotic environmental stance. There are all these scientists who say we have to do something about global warming right now. Why won’t you? Seriously are you retarded?

Rove: Excuse me I’m just trying to have a nice night. I don’t want to get into an argument with you. This isn’t the place for this.

Rove turns back to his table.

Crow: Oh no, you are gonna listen to everything I have to say!

Crow grabs Rove’s arm and tries to jerk him away from his table.

Rove: Don’t touch me. What’s wrong with you?

Crow: You can’t speak to us like that, you work for us.

Rove: I don’t work for you, I work for the American people.

Crow: We are the American people.

Both of these groups are wrong but who is closer to being accurate? I wish I knew. I have a feeling it’s Rove though. The guy was just sitting at his table having a few drinks and chatting it up. I doubt he wanted to get into a policy debate, especially with celebrities who often have an inflated sense of importance. It’s easy for Crow and David to think they were being tactful because they think they are in the right. When you believe your own argument, it’s more difficult for you to imagine that others might not see your evidence the same way. Also, Dana Milbank discussed the dinner on Monday night’s Countdown, and he said word was that Crow and David made their way up to Rove’s table pretty aggressively. It’s a shame he didn’t have any news on the actual exchange of words.

About a year ago I started looking at the Pentagon’s Selected Acquisition Report for some fat from the budget I could dream about cutting. The SAR is a brief list of the weapons programs the DoD is running. Most of what I wanted to cut would save a few billion here and there. I just looked at the December 2006 SAR (the latest I could find) and I am glad to see one program I particularly disliked is being cut into oblivion.

Land Warrior was created to give each foot soldier total situational awareness. The fog of war was supposed to become a historical footnote, at least for US soldiers. Land Warrior would have every soldier carrying a small computer in their uniforms that would keep them wirelessly connected to a battlefield LAN. The LAN would keep track of each soldier’s location and provide intelligence on enemy positions. All this data would be accessed through a map displayed on a wearable eyepiece.

Who wouldn’t want a system that could do all that? The soldiers for one. Popular Mechanics spoke with the soldiers who trained with the Land Warrior system. Their verdict is that the system is a pain in the ass. The equipment is heavy. The wiring makes getting dressed a big production. The electronic map has a lag. That delay makes the map useless during the quick action of a firefight. Some of the complaints could be due to the bitching that accompanies any change, but that map delay alone should kill the system as far as I’m concerned.

Comparing the SAR from September 2006 and December 2006 you see Land Warrior has been slashed by $3.4 billion. $671 million will still be spent on it because the army is shipping about half of the already purchased equipment to Iraq. The equipment will only be given to officers so the average infantryman is spared.

Even if this program worked flawlessly I would still be very skeptical of it. It seems like making every soldier dependent on an electronic system puts them in even more danger of an electronic countermeasure. What if the enemy figures out how to access our battlefield network and get the location of all our soldiers? Hell, couldn’t the enemy just kill or capture one of our soldiers and have access to his eyepiece map? Even giving every soldier a simple radio beacon has its dangers. You can’t make it too permanent otherwise you put captured soldiers at risk. If the beacon was a part of the uniform, for instance inside the boot, the enemy is going to make captured soldiers ditch their boots. There’s no way you can make this a body implant otherwise we’ll end up with a lot of amputated soldiers. It’s gotta be something that can be easily removed. I’m actually a little skeptical of this as well. Couldn’t an enemy army just search for any radio signals and know where our soldiers are? The enemy knows where its own radio sources and civilian sources are. Anything else will be from the US.

I guess I worry that our military is obsessed with technological quick fixes. The Pentagon’s procurement process always seems to make projects grow in both cost and complexity. I just think a soldier needs simple tools that do their specific job well. The death of the Land Warrior program is a step in the right direction for once.

Ah, the University of Life

Little boy: I know three things about aliens. One, they don’t have hair. Two, they don’t have mouths. Three, they don’t have privates.
20-something: Then how do you know if it’s a boy or a girl alien?
Little boy: Um, they’re not boys or girls. They’re its… Or she-males.
20-something: Where did you learn ‘she-males’ from?!
Little boy: Third Avenue.

–N train
via Overheard in New York, Apr 22, 2007

By now you’ve heard the Alec Baldwin recording. I’ve heard it mentioned on at least three different news shows, and I don’t mean celebrity news. My local news station covered it. Then I saw it on NBC Nightly News. Keith Olbermann’s show Countdown had a segment on it too.

Is anyone really surprised by this? Yes Baldwin was harsh but doesn’t he strike you as that sort of guy? I always thought so. I’ve seen him do lots of interviews and he always puts on a big smile I think looks completely fake. He’s hiding a lot of anger from the public. Not just about his ex-wife either. I would be willing to bet good money Baldwin is the sort of guy who blows every slight, real or imagined, way out of proportion. Quick to anger and very demanding is just how I see him.

How else can you explain why he would explode over a missed phone call? His daughter was in LA at the time so it’s not like he was waiting to meet her. So what if she doesn’t answer. Can’t you just call another time? I wonder if this sort of misplaced rage is common in a bitter custody battle.

His choice of language really got my attention. The media is focused on that “thoughtless little pig” remark, but the rest of it only reinforces my opinion that Baldwin is tightly wound. The craziest part of it is when he says not answering his call humiliates him. He also goes on to threaten to flyto LA just so he can “straighten you out on this issue”. He’s probably fantasizing about flying there, sitting her down and spending several hours haranguing her about this.

For your listening pleasure, go to TMZ for the full recording.

I saw these Pamela Anderson pics a few days ago. She looked fairly busted. I was pretty disappointed because when I was growing up she was considered one of the most beautiful women around. She was a Baywatch babe remember! But time has passed and Pam is getting older. Age ruins everything doesn’t it?

I wasn’t going to bother mentioning this sad truth but she has addressed these pictures on her blog. I didn’t even know she had a blog. This is her entry from April 15th.

It’s only a family vacation. We had a great time in Maui – hope everyone had a great spring break too – no photographers.

Thank god I don’t have a google alert on myself (like some people I know do on themselves) – I’ve just been sent some pics from Hawaii – I have to laugh – well at least the world knows I don’t get botox – ha!…I’m much hotter in my mind – (I swear I look better) – then again I hardly check a mirror before I go outside – may start doing that more.

I may have to start working out too though – genes and gymnastics have gotten me this far.

I just refuse to let these paparazzi ruin my time or my lifestyle in general with my children – I’m not going to spend time putting makeup on or staying covered up on the beach – it’s definitely surreal though – I think I look alright but everywhere you turn you have a camera in your face – up you butt – it’s crazy – too many tabloids – must be running out of stuff to print…I’m a semi-retired single mom – hello?

I’m having a great time with my kids always!…nothing new.

She has a good point. It was a relaxing day at the beach with her kids. She shouldn’t have to fix herself up on a day like that. Everyone deserves some downtime to be lazy and let it all hang out. And ya know, all things considered, she’s still pretty good looking for a 39 year old.