Okay I wasn’t going to write about Paris Hilton being sentenced to jail, even though it’s an awesome story and I’m amazed a Hollywood judge would actually sentence a celebrity to jail time. I guess it shows that even the Hollywood judiciary has its limits. After all Paris seemed pretty brazen about ignoring her suspended license, and she even showed up 18 minutes late to her court date.

Anyway, I broke down and mentioned this here because of the most hilarious comment I read about this story. A link from Jalopnik led me to Defamer. There I read this:

IBentMyWookie-v2 says:

Dearest Baby Jesus
This totally makes up for that Darfur business.

Thanks again.

I don’t think that can be topped.

I never would have guessed this but Angelina Jolie outranks Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito. Here’s the story I read. Justice Alito attempted to enter the Waldorf Astoria, but US Marshals made him wait until after Jolie entered. They told him it was necessary so Jolie could make as fast an entrance as possible.

This story is just so ridiculous, I don’t even know how to process it. I wish the story ended with Alito throwing down a fit, maybe even giving Jolie some choice words. Why were US Marshals even providing security? She’s not part of the government. How whacked out is our society’s priorities that some globe trotting actress gets greater consideration than a Supreme Court justice!

Another thing I’m left puzzled with is why the marshals couldn’t just let Alito through. He’s on the Supreme Court. You can pretty well trust he’s not a terrorist. He’s not going to kidnap or attack Jolie. Couldn’t they just open a door and let him quietly slip through?

I’ve been seeing commercials for RGX bodyspray for weeks now. I don’t give a crap about the product, but RGX is notable for the spokeswoman they’re using for their commercials. She looks so amazing I had to hit Google and find out who she is. Thank you Double Viking for the info.

The girl is Rachel Specter and despite having a pretty good list of credits, I wouldn’t exactly call her famous but she’s trying. Hopefully we’ll see a lot more of Rachel in the future. For now, I’m going to enjoy these commercials.

Loading...

Loading...

A woman is never more beautiful than when she’s carrying a child. What bunk! All that talk about how a pregnant woman is beautiful, or has that magical “glow”, is a lot of crap. That’s just stuff people say to make pregnant women feel better. After all gaining 40 pounds in a pot belly really must hurt your self esteem.

I really surprised the hell out of myself though. The picture you see below is of a very pregnant Jaime Pressly at the Screen Actors Guild Awards. I think that was a few months ago but this is the first time I’ve seen these pictures. Good lord I have never been attracted to a pregnant woman until right now. Pressly is stunning! The Superficial has more pics of her at the SAG Awards. Enjoy some fine pregnant ass while I try to rebuild my preconceptions.

The fight between Karl Rove and the enviro-celeb duo of Cheryl Crow and An Inconvenient Truth producer Laurie David is the best piece of news I’ve read in a long while. It’s the sort of story that’s easily twisted to fit your political persuasion.

At last weekend’s White House Correspondents Dinner those three got into an argument that on the surface was about the environment but was really tinged with politics. I would have liked to tell you about this first hand but it looks like the post office lost my invitation. They do this every year. I really should lodge a complaint one of these days. At the dinner Crow and David decide to approach Rove, who was sitting at his table, and make a plea for him to reconsider his opinion on the state of the environment. That much is plain. Lets look at the exchange though their eyes.

Crow/David Filter

Crow and David approach Rove discretely and respectfully.

Crow: Hello Mr. Rove. Do you have a free moment? I was hoping we could discuss your stance on the environment. It’s a topic that is dear to me and I wonder if you would be willing to re-examine the science on the subject.

Rove: Shut up you stupid bitch!

Rove turns away.

Crow: Excuse me?! Please Mr. Rove, be reasonable. I just wanted to have a rational discussion. Why won’t you listen for just a few minutes?

Crow taps Rove’s arm to get his attention.

Rove: Don’t touch me you goddamn liberal!

Crow: You can’t speak to us like that, you work for us.

Rove: I don’t work for you, I work for the American people.

Crow: We are the American people.

Rove Filter

Crow and David march up to Rove’s table wearing malicious grins.

Crow: Hey, I want to talk to you about your idiotic environmental stance. There are all these scientists who say we have to do something about global warming right now. Why won’t you? Seriously are you retarded?

Rove: Excuse me I’m just trying to have a nice night. I don’t want to get into an argument with you. This isn’t the place for this.

Rove turns back to his table.

Crow: Oh no, you are gonna listen to everything I have to say!

Crow grabs Rove’s arm and tries to jerk him away from his table.

Rove: Don’t touch me. What’s wrong with you?

Crow: You can’t speak to us like that, you work for us.

Rove: I don’t work for you, I work for the American people.

Crow: We are the American people.

Both of these groups are wrong but who is closer to being accurate? I wish I knew. I have a feeling it’s Rove though. The guy was just sitting at his table having a few drinks and chatting it up. I doubt he wanted to get into a policy debate, especially with celebrities who often have an inflated sense of importance. It’s easy for Crow and David to think they were being tactful because they think they are in the right. When you believe your own argument, it’s more difficult for you to imagine that others might not see your evidence the same way. Also, Dana Milbank discussed the dinner on Monday night’s Countdown, and he said word was that Crow and David made their way up to Rove’s table pretty aggressively. It’s a shame he didn’t have any news on the actual exchange of words.

By now you’ve heard the Alec Baldwin recording. I’ve heard it mentioned on at least three different news shows, and I don’t mean celebrity news. My local news station covered it. Then I saw it on NBC Nightly News. Keith Olbermann’s show Countdown had a segment on it too.

Is anyone really surprised by this? Yes Baldwin was harsh but doesn’t he strike you as that sort of guy? I always thought so. I’ve seen him do lots of interviews and he always puts on a big smile I think looks completely fake. He’s hiding a lot of anger from the public. Not just about his ex-wife either. I would be willing to bet good money Baldwin is the sort of guy who blows every slight, real or imagined, way out of proportion. Quick to anger and very demanding is just how I see him.

How else can you explain why he would explode over a missed phone call? His daughter was in LA at the time so it’s not like he was waiting to meet her. So what if she doesn’t answer. Can’t you just call another time? I wonder if this sort of misplaced rage is common in a bitter custody battle.

His choice of language really got my attention. The media is focused on that “thoughtless little pig” remark, but the rest of it only reinforces my opinion that Baldwin is tightly wound. The craziest part of it is when he says not answering his call humiliates him. He also goes on to threaten to flyto LA just so he can “straighten you out on this issue”. He’s probably fantasizing about flying there, sitting her down and spending several hours haranguing her about this.

For your listening pleasure, go to TMZ for the full recording.

I saw these Pamela Anderson pics a few days ago. She looked fairly busted. I was pretty disappointed because when I was growing up she was considered one of the most beautiful women around. She was a Baywatch babe remember! But time has passed and Pam is getting older. Age ruins everything doesn’t it?

I wasn’t going to bother mentioning this sad truth but she has addressed these pictures on her blog. I didn’t even know she had a blog. This is her entry from April 15th.

It’s only a family vacation. We had a great time in Maui – hope everyone had a great spring break too – no photographers.

Thank god I don’t have a google alert on myself (like some people I know do on themselves) – I’ve just been sent some pics from Hawaii – I have to laugh – well at least the world knows I don’t get botox – ha!…I’m much hotter in my mind – (I swear I look better) – then again I hardly check a mirror before I go outside – may start doing that more.

I may have to start working out too though – genes and gymnastics have gotten me this far.

I just refuse to let these paparazzi ruin my time or my lifestyle in general with my children – I’m not going to spend time putting makeup on or staying covered up on the beach – it’s definitely surreal though – I think I look alright but everywhere you turn you have a camera in your face – up you butt – it’s crazy – too many tabloids – must be running out of stuff to print…I’m a semi-retired single mom – hello?

I’m having a great time with my kids always!…nothing new.

She has a good point. It was a relaxing day at the beach with her kids. She shouldn’t have to fix herself up on a day like that. Everyone deserves some downtime to be lazy and let it all hang out. And ya know, all things considered, she’s still pretty good looking for a 39 year old.

Has this actually worked on anyone? An ad with a naked girl is supposed to get men’s attention. How many men do you know wearing furs? Sure there was the one Seinfeld episode about it but that’s it.

Another thing that bothers me is how plastic Holly Madison looks in this picture. The pictures on her website look so much better. This blondie is conventionally pretty, but something happened with this photo that made her skin look unreal. I guess this is what bad lighting can do. Oh but don’t worry, I’d still totally bang her.

I don’t really understand why this exists, but Kevin Federline has his own search engine. I can’t imagine he had this idea himself. I’m not sure what’s more ridiculous though. Either one of his friends suggested this, but that couldn’t be because they would know as little about the Internet as he would, or K-Fed has a staff working to promote his image. However the very idea of people making a living off of Kevin Federline’s celebrity seems laughable. A celebrity-branded search engine seems like such a ridiculous idea by itself. Maybe one of Federline’s friends did think of this.

Whoever cooked up this cockamamie scheme tried to give people a compelling reason to use it. When you search you’re entered into a prize drawing, but the prizes are awfully weak. So far I’ve seen “Entry into Autograph Sweepstakes” and “Kevin Federline T-Shirt” as prizes. If K-Fed wants to get more publicity than a few blogs sarcastically mocking him he needs to up the ante. I would totally switch over to this search engine if there prizes like “Have Kevin Federline serve you lunch at Burger King” or “Make Kevin pump your gas”. Demeaning? Sure. But I’m certain there will be cameras on him.

Sometimes news just knocks the wind out of you. When I loaded MSNBC and saw their headline “Anna Nicole dies” I was so stunned, I just stopped and stared for a good number of seconds. It actually took a bit for that information to sink in. What surprises me more than this news is my reaction to it. I am actually saddened by this. I usually don’t give a crap about what happens to celebrities. This time is different.

Anna Nicole was found collapsed in her hotel room by her personal nurse. Paramedics were called but ultimately nothing could be done and she was declared dead. So little is known now but everyone is pretty much assuming this was a drug overdose. I would bet it was a combination of some kind of prescription drugs with alcohol that killed her. It’s just a feeling, but somehow I just don’t think it was your standard party drugs.

Amazingly, only hours after her death, people are fighting over her memory. On Larry King Live Monique Goen, the wife of the TRIMSPA company’s CEO and Joanie Laurer (best known as the WWE female wrestler ‘Chyna’) got into a nasty fight. Laurer claimed to be a friend of Anna Nicole’s who would often hang out with her. Goen objected and accused Laurer of trying to build up her own celebrity by hitching on to this tragic story.

I am certainly sad to see fate fall upon Anna. I always felt some sympathy for her. She was a pretty girl from the middle of nowhere, who slept her way into some money. Okay it’s hardly a heroic life story but if sleeping with old people for money isn’t work then I don’t know the meaning of the word! Seriously though she did have her tough times being the butt of national jokes and, worse, having to bury her son a few months ago. Now she’s gone but her celebrity will live on and probably in a much better light.